Bad Football

Warning for any female readers: the following blog contains a blunt discussion of football in the midwest. You should refraid from reading further if the subject bores you to death.

I wanted to share with you a few thoughts on football of late.

1: The Brown's really suck (4-10) but why is all of Cleveland complaining when they could be the Detroit Lions (0-14 now) who are well on their way to the first ever 0-16 season by any NFL team EVER. The Lions are so bad and so hopeless that the Browns better watch out or Detroit might just steal Romeo Crennel and Ken Dorsey out from under Cleveland's nose.

2: I thought it was really funny when Braylon Edwards was denying trade rumors and complaining that he had a target on his back because he played for (I won't say he went to school at) U of Michigan. Is he suggesting that he wants to play for the Lions instead? see above.

3. The highlight of the Browns game last night was that their kicker, Phil Dawson, kicked his 30th field goal of the season. For those of you unfamiliar with the game, that's a lot. That means that 40 some odd yards away is as close as the team can get to the end zone.
Anyway Mr. Dawson had a great quote that I thought I would share with you. It went something like this: Like they say back home, the white spot on the top of the chicken shit is still chicken shit. I don't know where that man is from but I like it.

4. Also in football news and I've saved the best for last: A browns fan was pulled over and ticketed BECAUSE THE LAWN MOVER HE HAD CONVERTED INTO A MOTORIZED COUCH THAT HE USED TO MOVE DRUNK FANS AROUND THE MUNI LOT WHILE TAILGATING HAD EXPIRED PLATES. Come on CPD give the guy a break!

Candy

If anyone is looking for a sure way to avoid gaining weight over the holidays here is my advice: MAKE CANDY.
No I'm not kidding. I had a day off yesterday and I spent the whole day in the kitchen mixing, melting, kneading, rolling, dipping drizzling and packing. I made about 4 pounds of peanut brittle, 5 dozen chocolate covered cherries, 8+ (I lost count) dozen truffles (mint, coffee, almond and orange flavors) along with about 3 dozen each white and dark chocolate covered pretzel sticks. I also have to finish up a few batches of cream cheese mints and peppermint bark.
And now, as always, I don't want to see another piece of chocolate for at least 3 months. I couldn't even get myself to sample the truffles and I have to rely on Joel's palate to be sure that they taste better than they look. I hope everyone likes candy 'cause if you see me in the next month, it's comin' your way!

S

Split Genre

I have a confession to make:

I have a split personality when it comes to tastes in books. I never really thought I had a certain genre but now I think I have two.

I really enjoy depressing, "life-vision changing", novels like Kingsolver's Poisonwood Bible (a must read if you haven't already), Martel's Life of Pi and Garcia Marquez's Love in the Time of Cholera. Throw in The Heart of Darkness and Lord of the Flies and I am one happy camper.

But now I have to admit that I have another favorite genre that I never really thought about. I kind of have a thing for the undead. In highschool and college I ate through Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles and Witching Hour series. I really enjoyed Kostova's The Historian and Brooks' World War Z. Now I'm afraid I'm hooked on the Twilight Series. (Thanks Alyssa and be warned Marni).

I just finished reading Twilight because Like Marni I quit reading One Drop. I quit the book club book because I found the author unbearable. I don't really know what a WASP is but I don't think they should be allowed to write books anymore. I only made it 100 pages in and unfortunately I did buy the book, (stupid Amazon credit card). I may try again but it will only be in despirate attempt to keep my perfect 100% reading rate intact. Now I wish I had just bought the whole Twilight series. I should have known. Why have I denied my love for undead books before?

"So What Brings You To The ER Tonight?..." or "How the Grinch Dr. Mulder Stole Christmas"

I open many of my patient interviews after the usual "Hi I'm Dr. Sarah you must be..." with a joke or an open ended "What brings you in tonight?"
Tonight as I introduced myself to my five year old patient and asked what the matter was, the answer I got was "Is there a Santa Claus?" The little fellow had his sister in the room emphatically shaking her head "no" as well as his mom who just looked at me with pleading "just-break-it-to-him-nice-so-I-don't-have-to-do-it-myself" eyes. I was crushed and at a loss for words and like he just had read my mind, so was my patient. I didn't have to say anything. He just knew by the shocked look on my face.
He started crying and all of a sudden everything hurt.

Which brings me to the question Joel and I are pondering:

How far do you go to foster the idea of Santa Claus?
Is it considered lying to your child?
How and when does it end?

Please never bring your kids to the ED to have the pediatrician on call break the bad news and destroy a beloved childhood icon.

To Wean or Not To Wean

Warning for any male readers: The following involves a frank discussion of the biologic uses of breasts though no graphic images will be used you should refrain from reading if the subject makes you dizzy or uncomfortable

Well Adeline will be 9 months old on Wednesday and I can't believe how quickly the time has passed. She is getting so big and is such a little person now. She has favorites: her favorite food is carrots, her favorite snack is Teddy grams. Her favorite toy is the remote control. She loves bed time and her story, she waves (I can't say if she means "Hi mommy", "I want that" or "Hey look at my hand") She loves her giraffe and hates the Cheat. She is starting to crawl and loves to stand with a little help of course.
She loves to nurse and I love to nurse her. I especially love the first thing in the morning and the last thing at night nursing sessions. When I think back on learning to nurse and how hard it was in the beginning it is really amazing that I enjoy it so much. I am really happy with our little bonding sessions.
What I hate is pumping. I'm not exactly blessed with the biggest milk supply and I have to pump a lot to get enough to send with her to school while I am on a 24 hour shift. Granted she nurses less now than she did before she started solid foods but it still sucks to be tied to a pump especially at work. Adeline has teeth but she has never bit me. She's a good little nurser I've been very lucky. I just kind of want my body back...a little...I think.
I want to stop pumping but keep nursing. My hesitation is that this will mean that she has to have some formula when she's in daycare and I'll still have to pump when I do 24 hour shifts. I'm so happy to have made it to 9 months which is a lot longer than most professional moms make it and I don't like the idea of formula.... (evil empire peddling the most engineered, least natural product you could buy in the grocery store including Twinkies and hairspray) I just really hate the mechanical twins. I hate the setting up, the pumping, the constant cleaning...

Sigh

So if you have been there before or even if you haven't but would like to give me some advice I would really appreciate it.

S

I need a bigger Nightstand

I have always loved to read. It is a habit that my parents successfully instilled upon me at a very early age. (I read The Hobbit when I was 8 and was devouring Mitchner by junior high) But, save having a book to read for school and one for "fun", I have always managed to hold myself to one novel at a time. I have tried to adhear to this limit partly because of a touch of ADD but mostly because I was afraid to become my father. (Sorry Dad) I often thought that his demise would come the night the giant stack of partially finished works toppled off of his night stand and crushed him in his sleep. It obviously never happened and I have become lax to my rule. I just finished The Historian, a novel chronicling the death and burial of Dracula in parallel to the hunt for his final resting place. It was nearly 700 pages of Eastern European pseudo-history but I enjoyed it.
But before I finished that I had started Those Who Save Us for our upcoming book club. Together with the trashy novel I picked up for my recent trip to Boston,The Other Boleyn Girl and the pointless Labyrinth which I think I'm going to have to start over if I ever want to give it a fair shot there were 4 novels sitting on my nightstand along with the usual girly things, an alarm clock, lotion, 2 of Adeline's toys, a lamp and a spit rag. My nightstand is only 12"x18".
Meanwhile the list of books I want to read keeps growing and growing.

The Madness needs to stop

Alyssa, Aarthi, Deven, ANYONE ELSE IN OR FROM TOLEDO!! Do not let Joe the Plumber anywhere near your shitter! The Chode doesn't know what he's talking about!







Yes if you can handle the above 5 minute clip of fox news you find that they are defending Obama's policy on Israel. It must have really hurt.

And a few words for McCain.

1. Stop calling nuclear energy "green" It is not. And fine you want to build 45 nuclear reactors? Where ya gonna put them? I guarantee they won't go in his daughter's backyard or anywhere near any of the 7 houses he owns and neither will the waste they produce. No. It is the poor who live in the shadow of reactors.

2. I TOLD YOU TO STOP CALLING ME YOUR FRIEND!!

Hope is coming
Change is coming
Get out, vote and make it happen!

Why yes that is baby vomit on my shoe...
why do you ask?

I only mention this because I looked down at my feet during my first overnight shift this past week and noticed that Adeline had vomited on my shoe and I had not bothered to clean it off. It was a new low. I think that must be the definition of "letting yourself go". I went out the next day and joined a gym, cleaned my shoes and vowed to try to take better care of myself.

It was a busy week though. Joel's parents came into town over the weekend so I spent much of the week cleaning in preparation. I then got a little distracted and painted the plant room and redid the floors. It looks great. Next I think I'll do the dining room. Any color suggestions?...

Not being chief is great. I've been able to spend more time with Adeline and more time at home. My first two shifts at lakewood were fine. No I take it back, my first shift was fine. My 24 hour shift this past weekend was awful. It was like I was a resident again. I was up all night admitting patients and clearing plans with other docs. (I'm not the pimary for admitted patients) I saw about 12 kids in 4 hours the ED all of whom actually needed the ED. All I can say is thank God I had gone out the night before and had a fun evening with Kevin and Kelly and 2 pitchers of Maragaritas. (Joel's parents watched Dela)

Speaking of Dela...
We love the Fall!!!

My pager is off...

For those of you who know me well you also know that my pager is never off. I have been on call every other day for the past 16 months with the exception of 8 weeks of maternity leave. Even then my pager was on vibrate most of the time.

I am no longer a chief resident.

Cleaning out my office was strange and I know that my co-chief will miss me. I feel a little like the big sister who went off to college (again). At any rate I have closed that chapter of my life and I am excited to start the next.

My first shift is Tuesday night. Wish me luck.

FOUND: Joel's Missing Leg

We are back from Boston. For those of you who don't know, Joel and I went to Boston for the annual meeting of the American Academy of Pediatrics. The conference was great as it always is and I got to spend some good time catching up on some Gen Peds topics that I haven't had a chance to keep up with being chief. I also got to spend some time with Joel and Adeline. We went one afternoon to New Hampshire to see some friends Sean and Sadie. They are expecting their first little boy on Halloween. Joel liked that trip because we rented a Cadillac. Actually we rented a Chevy Aveo or similar but the rental company goofed and we got a wicked, pimped out, black Cady with tinted windows, a killa' sound system and a V8. During that drive (2+ hours to go 60 miles) I decided I could never live on the east coast.

We also spent an afternoon at the New England Aquarium. Adeline loved the turtles and jelly fish. She kept calling the penguins like she calls the cat, "AAh, AAh". She did very well on the trip. She fussed during the plane ride out but slept during the plane ride back.

This was also our first test of cloth diapers on the road without a Nana's house to wash and hide the dirty ones. I have to say it worked out fine. The wet bag we kept in the bathroom at the hotel did it's job great and we didn't have to waste time rinsing etc. I must admit though that I feel sorry for the poor drug sniffing dog that had to check out that suitcase on the way back though. It probably died right there. We're expecting a bill from the department of homeland security to replace their dachshund.

But we are back. Last night was perogies, wine and presidential debating with the Hatgases. Can we all please stop talking about this Joe the plumber? Why isn't anyone talking about Jane behind the counter at Macy's or Jill the single mom in college. At least John McCain stopped calling me his friend.

Debatable

These come courtesy of my mother. God Bless Her

I may be a little biased but I think Obama won last nights debate. I just wish John McCain would stop calling me "My Friend" I'm not his friend. I'm also beginning to feel a little bit creeped out by the man. His voice during debates is just a little too "guy-in-the-back-of the-bus'ish" and I still haven't decided if his right hand is real or made out of Vietnamese Bamboo.

12 days and 10 minutes

Scum of the Earth
and no it's not lawyers...

It's doctors who work for insurance companies.
This week was very busy for me. I was "on service" which means that I round with the residents in the hospital all day and answer pages all night. One of my patients this week was a young man whose condition required very intensive inpatient therapy. Ideally it would be at some sort of rehab facility. I got a call from his insurance company on Tuesday saying that they were not going to pay for any more of his hospitalization. In fact they weren't going to pay for the last week either. When I called, the nice lady who answers the phone for them suggested I have a "peer to peer" review of the case. Sounded good to me so I agreed and a little while later the devil himself called me back.
"This is Dr. -------" he said, "I understand you want our decision (Code for we're not paying) reviewed."
So after a long discussion about how this child would not last 24 hours at home, how I feared for his life and well being and how he was much sicker than his numbers looked Dr. Devil told me he wasn't changing his mind. I asked him what I should do for this child. He suggested an inpatient rehab facility. I informed him his boss wasn't paying for that either. After a moment of silence he directed me to an appeals process in not very nice terms. He then told me that my patient and his family would just have to "cope".
That is where things could have really broken down. I wanted to:
1. Ask him how many people you have to kill on the operating table before they take away your licence and you have to work for the insurance company.
2. Ask him if his mother would be proud of what he did every day and if this was the reason he went to medical school. And where the Hell did he go to medical school anyway?
3. Wish this nasty disease on his children so that his employer could deny him of benefits.

But I didn't. I just told him I thought this was rediculous and hung up on him.

Stupid insurance doctors.

23 Days, 23 hours and 24 minutes....
but who's counting?

Yes this is Sarah Palin in the 1980s.
Her shirt says "I may be broke but at least I'm not flat busted."
I wonder if this makes her qualified to handle our economic crisis????

S

One hundred years from now it will not matter what kind of car I drove, what kind of house I lived in, how much I had in my bank nor what my clothes looked like.

One hundred years from now it will not matter what kind of school I attended, what kind of typewriter I used, how large or small my church, but the world may be a little bit better because I was important in the life of a child.

~ Margaret Fishback Powers ~

Last night at I cured scabies

OK
So
I do already have a blog but here is my DelEmma:
I need a place I can speak freely. A blog where I can be who I am with my friends in person. My other blog while kept regularly is dedicated to our family. We post pictures of our beautiful daughter, tell watered down stories about our Loony Adventures but because of the audience we have to keep it PG and politically neutral.

I am not always PG and I am definitely not politically neutral.

I am an individual in a perfect family of 3.

I work, I play, I swear and I love

You can follow me if you like.

S